Whether you wish to become an artist or an architect, a career athlete or an astronaut, setting sights on your long term goals is necessary to drive you towards it. But our life does not run like water in an aqueduct; it is a mountain stream, which must cleave rocks to reach its destination. To see us through difficult challenges, dreams are not enough; we need a strong inner self to motivate and sustain us towards our goals. In ancient Greek mythology, Apollo blazed his way, each day, on a two-wheeled chariot. Your life-chariot also requires two wheels, the driven wheel of your chosen career goals balanced by the driving wheel of self help. But is self building more than just a do-good ideal? Join me to discover that self help is a practical event and many of us already benefit from it on a daily basis; however, by applying it purposefully, you can make it a powerful ally.

Almost everyone has a dream car. Usually you start the purchasing process, by determining affordability. The next steps are usually taking a test drive, negotiating a price, completing paper work, securing insurance and driving the car home. However, some of us add a few more details to the transaction. How about investigating different cars models to suit your needs? What about considering fuel economy and environmental impact? Would you like the sales person to guide you towards a better decision? Do you want the best price or just drive a hard bargain? Is this an opportunity to learn negotiating skills or just display a hard-nosed attitude? Are you going to remain thrifty through the closing process or mindlessly pay for unnecessary frills? Now, in the first scenario, you were driven on the single wheel of desire. In the second, you balanced yourself with an additional wheel of becoming a well-informed consumer, a sensible spender and a skillful negotiator. This is, as a simple illustration, self-help. If, through self building, you not only made a great purchase but also learned new skills, then why not make it a purposeful part of every life transaction?

All of us remember the unparalleled fun we had as children just playing together. That simple-hearted joy wasn’t driven by the incentive of making sales; it was produced by the rewarding experience of learning social skills. As grown ups, we don’t vacation to save money; instead we spend hard earned cash willingly to experience new sights and sounds. Marriage has it charms in the novelty of an exciting relationship; even jobs which promise new skills are more fulfilling than those which appear stale. If life’s chariot is designed to run on two wheels, then why does it sometimes veer away on just one?

Children learn quite early that to get an ice cream cone all you have to do is to pay a dollar (or more) to the vendor. Although parents encourage saying “please”, in due course “please” may become a formality rather than an opportunity to improve social skills. Relationships can become an exchange of favors rather than an opportunity to become a better person. Providing services to clients and customers can degenerate into a list item rather than to improve one’s job skills. It should come as no surprise, then, that many marriages fall apart, and work turns into a chore. However, if being driven on the single wheel of desire has become your habit, don’t be intimidated. Adding the second wheel of self help to your life is much easier (and less expensive) than changing the transmission of your favorite vehicle from a two-wheel to a four wheel drive.
Whether you set out for the local beach or a vacation to Tahiti, I bet you are looking forward to a new and different thrill each time rather than travel details. In the illustration of purchasing your new car, when you focused on the learning as the essential goal, the best deal followed. Practice the same prioritizing everyday and the path towards your goal will become more enjoyable and rewarding. If you are in a relationship, focus on becoming a better friend and you won’t be disappointed. Whether you sell homes or solar panels, financial products or health services, by first emphasizing the self building experience, you will not only turn your work into play but also make it more financially fruitful. In Greek mythology, Apollo rode a two-wheeled chariot to light up the ancient world. You already have the wheel of your goals. Add to it the wheel of self help and it will drive your chariot of success to benefit both yourself and those around you.